He is a househusband and he proudly calls himself one. He does not work outside the home. Instead, he takes care of his household full-time. From cooking and cleaning to looking after his daughter and preparing meals for his working wife, Amit Kumar Dubey from Champaran, Motihari, Bihar, has redefined the role of men in marriage. The most remarkable part is that he does it all very naturally.When The Times of India reached out to him for an interview, Amit was surprised. He wondered what was so unique about what he was doing. Wasn’t it a natural thing? To manage home if one’s partner is working?
Amit chose a path that many men would find unthinkable. He gave up his job so that his wife could continue hers. He shares that his was a love marriage that eventually became an arranged one. His wife had one condition — she would marry only if her family agreed. They finally did, and the couple got married in December 2015.Amit, who holds a diploma in mechanical engineering, was working in a pharmaceutical company in Baddi, Himachal Pradesh. However, certain family circumstances prevented him from returning to his job. His wife needed support, and he did not want to abandon her during a difficult phase.
“Some situations happened in the family, and I could not go back to join my job. My wife needed support, and I couldn’t leave her at that time. She is very gentle and was handling a lot on her family front. I have never spoken about these things to anyone before,” he says.Later, his wife was transferred to Kolkata, where she was posted as a clerk in a bank. Amit followed her and found a job there. But a few months later, they had to return home after his wife suffered a miscarriage and became very weak. Amit again chose to stay by her side, as his private job would not have allowed him extended leave.
When their daughter was born, Amit made the decision to become a full-time homemaker. For his wife, it was difficult to manage a government job along with raising a child, and he stepped in without hesitation.Does he have any regrets?“Yes, sometimes when I am alone, I worry about my family. My parents and younger brothers have never questioned my decision and have always supported me. But as the eldest son, I feel I should be fulfilling my responsibilities towards them. That thought troubles me at times,” he admits.
When asked whether his wife expects him to work, he says, “She has never said anything. We have a perfect understanding.”Amit becomes emotional while speaking about his mother. “I was the eldest child in a family with no sisters, and naturally I used to help my mother with household chores. Today, I am doing the same for my wife.”
Amit spends his day cooking food for his wife and daughter, cleaning, helping his daughter with homework and managing every other household chore. He says he feels guilty about keeping a house help as he feels since he is not working, he must help at home as much as possible. “I had almost planned a food business in my free time when the idea of starting an Instagram page occurred to me and I am so overwhelmed by the love that I am getting! There are so many people who validate what I am doing and this is so overwhelming,” says Amit. Amit is truly an inspiration. He chose partnership over pride and responsibility over social expectations. Despite being a mechanical engineer, he stepped away from his career to support his wife and raise their daughter, without feeling insecure about his role. He proves that true strength in a marriage lies in mutual support, understanding, and breaking stereotypes. By embracing homemaking with dignity, he sets an example for men and women that caring for family is not about gender, it’s about commitment and love.
