Girija Oak, daughter of veteran Marathi actor Girish Oak and pharmacist Padmashree Phatak, has spoken candidly about how her parents’ separation deeply shaped her childhood and emotional well-being. In a recent interview, Girija said the separation wasn’t a sudden shock but something she lived with every day.“So it happened with me… there was a bond between my mom and dad, which we knew about. Gradually it increased and then eventually the decision was made that they would separate,” she told Hauterrfly, adding, “It wasn’t like I woke up one day and I had a trauma. This was something that was part of my life. It was everyday survival.”She explained how, amid daily responsibilities like studies and college, she didn’t realize how deeply it was affecting her. “You don’t really know how it’s affecting you. I didn’t understand what was happening to me or if anything was happening to me at all,” Girija shared.
‘I thought something was wrong with me medically’
Over time, the stress began manifesting physically. “I started getting panic attacks. I would get palpitations, my palms would get sweaty, I would start getting breathless, and I would start sweating,” she recalled. What confused her further was that these episodes would occur even during non-stressful moments. “It could happen when I was traveling to college or studying in my lab… but it was my body responding to stress that had built up for a very long time.,Believing it to be a medical issue, she sought professional help. “I thought something was wrong with me medically. I went to the doctor and asked her if it was related to my heart,” Girija said. It was the doctor who first suggested therapy. “She guided me towards a psychologist for talk therapy, and I was also put on mild SOS medication.”Girija admitted she struggled to speak about therapy at the time. “I did not speak about it to anyone because I had no idea how it was. It wasn’t even the stigma of being called crazy. I just didn’t understand what to say,” she said. Opening up about how her parents’ separation affected her relationships, Girija said, “I live with this baggage that I am a product of a failed or broken marriage.” She shared that the pressure to “do it right” influenced her approach to relationships. “If I hadn’t taken this load on myself, I would have stood up for myself in some of my previous relationships,” she admitted.
,Suhrud felt like a balm’
Girija said she found emotional safety and friendship with her husband, film producer Suhrud Godbole“Fortunately for me, I met somebody who is genuinely a very good friend of mine before everything else,” she said, “I can talk to Suhrud about anything, There is no such topic that is a no-go,”Reflecting on their bond, she added, “We know each other’s sensitive areas. He knows where my buttons are. He may not press them, but he hovers around them during our fights,” she said with a laugh, adding that they have been together for nearly 15 years, including 14 years of marriage.Talking about a difficult heartbreak before meeting Suhrud, Girija said, “I have had one big heartbreak. Everything was bad before Suhrud.” Meeting him, she said, changed her perspective. “When I met Suhrud, it felt like a balm. When we go through red flags, we see the green flags better.”Summing up her journey, she added, “Every morning you wake up and you want to choose the same person all over again. It’s very easy to say 14 years.”
